A Fairy Tale

By M. Willow

Part Three

“Why did you do it, Evelyn?  Why?”  Starsky asked, watching the red-head as she sat next to him the restaurant.  They had just left the precinct.  It had been a long day waiting for the red tape and Dobey’s favors to get them out of jail.  Both detectives were tired, angry, and more than confused by Evelyn’s brush with the law.  It was Hutch who suggested the small, restaurant that served American foods like hamburger and greasy fries.   Now they both sat looking expectantly at the girl. 

She was all innocence, batting her eyes sadly between the two detectives.  Hutch could see that she was sorry she had taken the dresses.

“They were so pretty.  I just couldn’t help myself.  I figured that if father did not know I had purchased them.  Well, maybe I could keep them” she put her head down.  “Even if I could never wear them.  I’m so sorry.”

Hutch immediately felt sorry for the girl.  “It’s okay.  Just don’t do it again.”

The girl looked up, a tear in her eye.  “I am so sorry.  I’ll never do it again.  I promise.”

Starsky patted her hand and Hutch shot him a glare.  He could see the dark-haired detective was falling for Evelyn. 

She sniffled and Hutch handed her his handkerchief.  “Thank you, you’re so kind.  It means a lot to me.  Now I…I... need to…” she blushed, her eyes cast downward.

“Oh, sure.” Hutch stood.  Starsky continued to sit, obviously not comprehending Evelyn’s intent. 

“What?” the dark-haired detective said when he noticed Hutch standing.

“The young lady needs to powder her nose,” Hutch said tightly. 

“Oh,” Starsky said, quickly jumping to his feet. 

Evelyn stood.  As she moved from the booth she dropped her purse and Hutch quickly picked it up and handed it to her.  The girl smiled gratefully and headed to the rest room which was in clear view of the detectives. 

Hutch took his seat, but Starsky was still standing, staring at the retreating figure of the girl. 

“You can sit down now, Starsk.” Hutch said, but Starsky didn’t appear to hear him.  Hutch noticed the stunned expression on the brunets face. 

“Hey, buddy.  What’s going on?”   Again he was ignored now Hutch was starting to get worried. 

“Earth to Starsky,” he said, tapping the table as he spoke.  Starsky had an incredulous look on his face.  He plopped down, taking a quick swig of water.

“Hey, buddy.  What’s going on?”  He grabbed Starsky’s hand.  He was shaking.  “Hey, talk to me.”  Starsky looked at him with a glassy stare.  Hutch was really worried now.  Something had to have happened that he’d somehow missed. 

He looked around the restaurant, thinking that maybe someone had come in.  He was on hyper alert now.   Seeing no one he recognized, he turned his attention back to his partner.

“Starsk, what is it?”

“It’s her.”  Starsky said, taking another sip of water.

 “What are you talking about?”

“Honey.  It’s Honey.”

Hutch couldn’t believe what he just heard.  How could Starsky still believe that innocent girl was Honey?   Hutch knew he had to get stern with his curly-haired partner.  “Now listen.  I don’t know why this Honey person has left you with this fixation, but   Evelyn is not Honey.  I repeat.  Evelyn is not Honey.”

“But she called me by our name.” Starsky insisted.

“When?  In the limo?”

“No.”

“In the store?”

“No…” Starsky paused, looking embarrassed.  “Just now.”

Hutch slammed his hand on the table, catching Starsky’s attention and more than a few people in the restaurant.  “No way.  I was right here.  The only thing that sweet girl said was that she needed to use the facilities.  You’re hearing things Starsk.  Wishful thinking.”

“No, it was when you were picking up her purse.  She kinda leaned into me and called me by our secret name.”

“And you positively heard it?” Hutch said, still disbelieving that his partner had heard the girl call him anything but Starsky.  Still, wondering how much this Honey person meant to the brunet who seemed almost obsessed with her.

“Well.  It wasn’t clear. I mean, it was hard to hear what with all the noise, but I think.  No.  I know she said…,” Starsky blushed.

“You heard her say what?” Hutch probed. 

“Can’t tell ya.”

“Okay.  You want to tell me that you think you heard that poor girl say something she couldn’t possibly have said and you’re not sure she said it and you can’t even repeat the name in public.”  Hutch shrugged.  “Since you won’t tell me I have to assume it’s an embarrasing name.  Something that wouldn’t be repeated in polite society.  Something that got you blushing and god knows it takes a lot to do that.”

The brunet looked down at his hands.  “Well.  You know, it’s kinda sexy.”

“Okay.  Is it possible you misheard what she said?  Her accent is pretty thick you know.”

Starsky sat back and took a sip of water, obviously replaying the moment in his head.

“I don’t know.  It sounded like….okay, you could be right.  Just that.  For a moment.  Well, let’s say you’re right.”

Hutch gave a sigh of relief.  “I better be.  Dobey will have our heads if we mess up again and the king might very well have yours if you mess with his daughter.”

“Okay, then it’s settled.  She probably said somethin’ else and I couldn’t make it out, that’s all.” Hutch could see his partner was not convinced.

“So help me, if you…” Hutch started, but the girl reappeared.  Hutch dashed a warning glare at Starsky, pointing the Hutchinson finger.

“I’m ready to go home,” Evelyn announced as soon as she got back to the table.  Both men stood and escorted her out to the car.

It was a quiet ride back to the embassy.  Starsky could see that Evelyn was embarrassed by her momentary lapse into shoplifting.  Starsky felt sorry for her.  Yes, stealing was wrong.  It was wrong for any reason, yet he felt the desperation she must have felt in stealing the dresses.  Again he wanted to wrap his arms around her.  Tell her everything would be okay. 

“Can you close the privacy window, please,” she asked, her accent so thick that Starsky had trouble understanding her.

The privacy window provided a soundproof environment and protected the passenger from view of the driver. 

“The window,” Evelyn repeated slowly.  “Can you please close it?  I would like to talk about this afternoon.  I know I did you a grave injustice and I would like to apologize in private.” 

Starsky didn’t want to close the window.   He didn’t trust himself to be alone with her.  As long as he could see Hutch, he felt in control.  The privacy window would prevent even a fleeting glance of the blond.

“Please,” Evelyn implored, her eyes sad. “I don’t know what I’ll do if you don’t forgive me.”   Starsky reached forward and closed the window.  He didn’t want her to think he was angry at her.  He was far from that.

As soon as the window was closed, Evelyn moved closer to him.  Her honey-colored eyes met his.   He melted instantly.  She touched his hand and he felt himself falling into those eyes

 “You’ve no idea what this means to me.”  He heard her say.  Now she placed a tiny hand on his knee and he gasped.  Something so simple, yet erotic in its simplicity.  He wanted to kiss her, to kiss her until they were both breathless and keep kissing her.  His jeans were becoming noticeably uncomfortable.  He squirmed against the leather.

She moved closer, closer to his lips.  He could feel her breath, smell her unique fragrance.  Oh, god, he thought, I should have left that damn window open.  Then her hand was touching his face, and he remembered what he thought he heard in the restaurant.  Had she called him by their name?  Or had wishful thinking made him hear something that was impossible? 

“I’m afraid I have a confession,” she said, her voice low.  “But first, I’ve been wanting to do this all day.”  She claimed his mouth with a kiss, a kiss so sweet yet sensuous at the same time.  He fought to break away.  It was wrong.  He was here to guard her, to protect her from what he was thinking of doing now.  She was an innocent.  Didn’t know what she was doing.  Still, his body didn’t object to what she was doing to him.  He deepened the kiss, his tongue tasting her lips, waiting for permission to enter.  She opened her mouth and moaned.  It sent shivers through him.  Soon their tongues moved in a lover’s dance.   He was on fire for her.   One kiss and he felt like she was everything.  He didn’t need food, water, nothing, just her.   He felt her hand on his knee, moving up, moving and he didn’t stop her.  He wanted to make love, right here, right now.  The world didn’t exist.  Just he and Evelyn.  He and Evelyn.

He tried to pull back, but his need for her was more powerful than his reason.  Now her hand was on his zipper and he didn’t stop her.  Starsky closed his eyes as the sensation she was causing in him threatened to take him over the edge.  He was kissing her now with wild abandonment, his hands caressing her breast still covered by the dress.  He had to stop, needed to stop.  He had a duty.  There was more to consider than his need for her.  A whole country was at stake.     He couldn’t do this.   

“Evelyn,” he said, pulling back, removing her hand from his arousal.  “We can’t.  It’s not right.  I’m here to guard your….”

“My virginity,” she said.  And he saw the unmistakable glimmer of mischief in her eyes.  “Well there’s none to guard.”

“Honey?” he said, looking into her eyes questioningly.

“In the flesh,” she whispered, her eyes dancing “Now come on,” she pulled him into a deep kiss.   “I need this, need to feel you inside me.  Please.”  She nuzzled his ear, tracing soft kisses down his neck, her hand pulling his shirt up, caressing his chest. 

“No,” he murmured, claiming her lips at the same time.  God, he was so turned on.  He could feel the rhythm of the car, here her soft moans, feel himself becoming impossibly harder as she touched him.  He found himself unzipping her dress, moving his hands up her thighs, feeling the warm, wetness that was so enticing.  Still, he fought for control. 

“We can’t,” he repeated.  “We can’t.  Ain’t right.”  But his hands didn’t agree and she arched her back as she moaned in ecstasy as he stroked her center causing a shiver to run up his spine.  God, he wanted her.  He wanted her more than when she called herself Honey.

“Honey, Honey, Honey,” he said, as he tried to catch his breath.  “How?” 

“There’s plenty of time for that,” Honey said, her voice low and throaty.    They were almost undressed now.  He was kissing her with maddening passion as they fell back on the soft leather of the limo.  The limo was large, more than comfortable for what they were doing.  And they were at least an hour from the embassy.

000000000

Hutch pulled the car into the driveway of the embassy.  He was more than a little concerned when he heard Evelyn request that the privacy window be closed and Starsky agreed.   He wondered about Honey.  Starsky had said it was all about lust yet couldn’t seem to get the girl out of his mind.  Fleetingly, he wondered if the brunet was right.  If Evelyn somehow found a way to spend two weeks in Los Angeles without anyone knowing it.  But, how could she do it?  The king would surely notice if one of his daughters were missing.  Still, the king would probably be quite comfortable back home.  Maybe not look for the princess.  Maybe not notice that one of his daughters had decided to see America a few weeks earlier than intended.   It would have been easy for her to return to Simbay without anyone knowing she’d ever left. 

Hutch got out of the car and waited for his partner to open the door.   He waited as the sun set in the orange-yellow sky.  It was a beautiful day in spite of what had happened earlier.

“Hey, partner, we’re here.”   He shouted, belatedly realizing that the two occupants would be unable to hear him.   Yet, surely, they had to realize the car wasn’t moving.  He waited for a few moments and Starsky opened the door and quickly got out, Evelyn following.  Hutch looked at his partner noticing, the blush on his face.  He raised a questioning eyebrow and Starsky quickly averted his eyes.   Not a good sign, he thought.  He looked at Evelyn who also blushed.  Definitely not a good sign.  It didn’t take a rocket scientist to figure out what had just happened.

“Well, it’s been fun,” she said, looking between the two detectives, letting her eyes linger on the brunet.  “I better get inside.  Father is expecting us for tea.  Eight sharp.”

Starsky looked at his watch.  “Yeah, eight sharp.  Ah… meet you in the room, Hutch.  Want to take a shower before we have tea.”   He turned and followed a quickly retreating Evelyn into the house, Hutch still looking at them as if they had sprouted wings and simply flew.

They were in the foyer of the embassy.  Starsky gently grabbed Evelyn, who smiled seductively? 

“You gotta explain what just happened,” he started.

She laid a playful hand on his face, caressing his cheek.  “Why, don’t you know?” Evelyn said teasingly.

“Honey, come on,” he whispered in frustration.  “How’d ya get here?”

Evelyn looked around when she heard a servant approach.  “Not here.  I’ll come to your room tonight.  But you’ve got to get rid of Hutch.  I can’t take the chance that he’ll find out.”

“Hutch already knows.”  Evelyn gave him a questioning glance.  “Tonight,” she said and raced up the stairs leaving a very puzzled detective.

000000000

“Okay, Starsky.  Start from the top,” Hutch demanded of the dark-haired detective spread out on the bed.  Starsky stared at the ceiling as he told Hutch how he’d discovered that Evelyn was actually Honey.  Hutch knew his partner had left a few intimate details out.

“Are you sure, buddy?” Hutch asked, hoping that some mistake had been made. 

“Yeah, don’t know how.  She said she would come to me tonight and tell me how she did it.  But, it’s Honey, Hutch.”

Hutch took a seat on the bed.  “Okay.  It’s Honey.  But you’ve got to stay away from her.  There’s no future and you know it.”

“Yeah, but it’s a little late to stay away.”  Starsky said, looking into his friends, sky blue eyes.

Hutch knew they were in trouble now.  Starsky seemed to be in love with the girl. 

Hutch put a comforting hand on his partner’s shoulder.  He had to somehow get through to the brunet.  It would be hard—he had fallen in love more than once only to see it in end tragedy.

“Starsk, you’ve got to come to your senses.  We’re on foreign soil.  We don’t know the penalty for sleeping with the king’s daughter.

Starsky sat up.  “Don’t you think I know that?  I tried, Hutch.  Really tried.  I couldn’t stop.  We couldn’t stop,” The brunet sat up, running a tired hand through his hair.  He locked eyes with Hutch.  “I know what I said about Honey, how it was a fling, how it didn’t mean anything, but Hutch, even then I felt a connection.  I was just tryin’ to deal with it.  Now we have a second chance. I Don’t think I can walk away from it.”

The grove between Hutch’s eyes deepened.  “Does she love you?”

“Yes.”

“She told you that?”

“Not in words, but Hutch.  Come on.  I’ve been around.  It was different.  When we made love, it was as if the whole damned world disappeared and it was just Evelyn and me,” he paused, searching for words.  “Even when I thought she was Honey, it hadn’t been like that.”

“Would she walk away from all she’s ever known, friends, family, her sister?   Her duties as a first daughter.  Would she, Starsk?”  Hutch asked quietly. 

Silence followed.  Hutch could see that Starsky  knew the answer to that question.  She had a duty as first daughter, a duty that every first daughter had had for centuries.  Would she walk away from that for the man she loved? 

Starsky still hadn’t answer.   Hutch spoke, his voice reassuring, “Listen, I’m gonna call Dobey and tell him we need off the case.”

“No,” Starsky said quickly.  “I can’t leave her,”

“Oh, god, Starsk.  You don’t have a choice.  You either leave now, or wait two weeks, but you’ve got to leave her.”

“And why should I?  Why is it every time I fall in love, every freakin’ time, I lose?  What is it about me that makes me such a loser in love, hah, you tell me that, Hutch.  What is it?” 

Starsky was getting angry now.  He rose and headed for the window, his body tense. “I’m tired of  it.  Tired.  I’m not letting go this time.  If I have to spend the next two weeks getting through to her I will.”

“Okay, Starsk,” Hutch said, coming to stand next to him, putting his hand on his partner’s tense shoulder, giving it a gentle squeeze.  “What do you want me to do that will make the next two weeks easier for you?”

“Well, being alone gonna be tricky.  Think you could come up with a plan?” the brunet asked, turning to face him.

Hutch smiled.  “You mean other than the back seat of my limo?”

Starsky colored, and looked down.  “Sorry about that.”

Hutch smiled, enjoying the moment. “I bet.  But, it’s okay, buddy.  Who am I to stand in the way of true love?  I’m sure I can come up with something.”

Honey came to him when the moon was full, casting slivers of light across the room.  He’d been in his room, Hutch having just left.  Starsky was struck by how beautiful she really was.  She wore nothing sexy, just a terry robe pulled tightly around her tiny waist. But she opened that robe and dropped it to the floor.  She was a dream as she slipped into his bed.  He kissed her deeply, the way they’d kissed in the car, his tongue darting into her mouth, his hands exploring every inch he could touch, soft smoothness of skin against his hardening body.  She moaned into his mouth.  God, he loved this woman.

Later he held her in his arms as she related the story that brought her into his life.

“It was Lori’s idea.” She said, her soft honey eyes meeting his.  “She said I should have one moment of happiness before I give myself, my life to a man old enough to be my grandfather.”

Starsky pulled her closer, wanting to protect her.  Wanting to be the man she was marrying.

“Lori and are are identical twins.  No one has ever been able to tell us apart.  At least since mother died,” Evelyn paused, the pain of her mother’s death sharply shown in her troubled expression.  He soothingly brushed a stray lock of hair from her face, and kissed her lips gently.  After a moment she continued with the story.

“Lori pretended to be both of us while I came to Los Angeles.  It was easy to slip back into Simbay without anyone knowing I had ever left.  Fenton and my sister are the only people who know.”

Starsky listened as her voice trailed off.  Through the window he could see the lavender-pink that indicated the first signs of light in the morning skies.  It was dangerous for her to be here.  The whole situation was dangerous. She had to know the baron would eventually discover her duplicity.  He had to tell her, tell her before it was too late.  In so many ways she was the innocent.

“Honey, how do you expect to pull this off?  Sooner or later your fiancé is gonna figure this out.  He’s gonna know you’re not—“

“That I’m not a virgin,” she finished.

Starsky hesitated.   He didn’t want to say it. 

“What will they do to you when they find out?”

She laughed a little.  The punishment is high I’m afraid.  Simbay has rules about sex outside of a marriage relationship.  But you see, I’ve already been with my intended.”

Starsky pulled back.  “I don’t understand.  The king said….”

“I know.  He said I hadn’t met him.  In reality, I did some months ago.  Lori finds it very easy to impersonate me when I need time alone.  Anyhow, I arranged a meeting with the man who would one day be my husband.  Through mutual agreement we spent the night together.  I was there for nearly a month.  You see, I wanted to get it out of the way.  It was less than pleasing.”

“Oh,” Starsky found himself feeling jealous.  He couldn’t bare the thought of her giving herself to another man, a man she didn’t love and only to get it out of the way.  Sex was so much more that that.  It was with them.

She turned to him.  “He was the first man I’d ever been with.  You are the second.  I want you to know, from the moment I first laid eyes on you, I knew that I loved you.  I know I came on strong, but I’m living on borrowed time.  In two weeks, my life will be over.  I wanted to experience life.  To know what it’s like to be a woman.  To make love with the sun in the sky.  To make love to the man I love.”   

He kissed her then, tenderly, the way he was feeling.  He needed that connection right now.  Finally they broke the kiss.  He had to convince her to stay.

“I must tell you the rest.” Evelyn said, her eyes meeting his.  It was hard to control himself when she looked at him that way.  “I couldn’t stop thinking about you once I returned to Simbay.  I didn’t know your name, where you lived, nothing.  But I knew where we met. Fenton has a soft spot for me so I had him make some discreet inquiries to find out who you were.  It didn’t take long.  Your celebrity status made it easy to find you.  After that it was pretty easy to get Fenton to recommend you and your partner as bodyguards.” 

“And told the king Hutch and me were gay,” he said, laughter in the words.

“It was the only way father would let you anywhere near me,” she said, in explanation of the gay ruse.  She lowered her eyes, and a soft blush appeared.  “Besides, I know the truth.”

And she did.  They’d made love almost every night when she was Honey.  He wondered if Hutch had come up with a plan that would allow them to be together again.  He didn’t want to resort to the limo.  This was the woman he loved.  He wanted to take her home with him.  Watch television, make love, make dinner, have a normal life.  That’s what he wanted.  And he wanted it with Evelyn.  

 “Now we have the next two weeks to ourselves,” Evelyn said. 

He met her eyes; saw the sincerity, the love, the hope, the desire.  All bundled into one redhead with only two weeks to live.  He wanted so much more.

“Honey, you can’t go through with this.  I love you.”

She leaned into him, kissing his lips gently, pulling back to look into his eyes.

“If only it were so simple.  I am the first daughter.  I have a duty to my country, to my king.  I cannot walk away from it, no more than you could walk away from being a cop.”

And Starsky understood that need to fulfill a duty, no matter how difficult.  He’d nearly died at the hands of Gunther.  He’d fought with everything he had, with everything Hutch had, to come back.  Being a cop was everything to him.  It was not just a job; it was a commitment to making the world a better place to live in.  It was about being partners with a man closer to him than his own brother.  Put simply, it was his life. 

Now, he was asking Evelyn to walk away from everything she held dear, for him.  Could he do the same?  If it was possible to live in Simbay, could he walk away from Hutch, being a cop, everything he knew and loved?  He knew the answer.  But dear God, the price was high.

“It’s too much to ask.  I love you.  I want you to be with me,” he said.

Evelyn lowered her eyes, and placed her soft hand on his chest, tracing the outline of a long forgotten scar.  “We’ve been through so much for what we love.  I remember Fenton showing me the newspaper articles about your injuries.  It had been years since some of it occurred, but I felt it like it had just happened.  I remember one picture of your partner.  He was just standing there, deathly white, his world crumbling because you were dying and I felt his pain.  I was actually there with him hoping you’d live.  We do so much for things we love.” 

She traced his lips with her finger.  “I’m asking you to let me go.  To let me be what I have to be.  It won’t be easy, but there is no choice.”

Starsky reached a desperate hand to her face.  He could feel her pulling away yet she hadn’t moved an inch. 

“Don’t know if I can do this,” he said.  

“You look at the riches in this house--the paintings, the sculpture--all originals, all worth millions.  But it is all we have.  The baron is rich.  He can save my country, my father, everything.  All he wants is an heir and me as his wife.  I can give him these things.  But please don’t make me beg you to let me go.  I will if I must.”

Her eyes were hesitant, watching him, waiting for him to make a decision.  Either case, she’d be gone.  Another woman leaving, another woman he loved.

“I need time,” he said.  “And even then I just don’t know.”

“It is all I can ask.” She said.

He closed his eyes as he felt her move.  He listened to the rustle of sheets, the warmth moving away from him.  And then the soft closing of the door.  She was gone.

Starsky marveled at his ingenious partner.  He had come up with the perfect plan.  It was simple.  Each day they would pretend that Evelyn needed to shop for her trousseau.  Hutch would drive and stop at the first store where Evelyn would buy a number of items.  Later he and Evelyn would sneak out to a waiting car, artfully arranged by Huggy.  The resourceful Huggy had also secured the help of two people who bore a passing resemblance to the two lovers. The doubles would spend the rest of the day riding with Hutch to various stores and scenic locations.  Later, he and Evelyn would switch places and return to the embassy.

Now, Starsky looked at the sleeping Evelyn.  She was snuggled against him in his arms, having fallen asleep during an old Bogie and Bacall film they’d been watching on the sofa of his apartment. 

They had a lot of those moments, falling asleep in each others arms, the television blaring in the background.  It was so normal, that for whole moments of time, he would sometimes forget that the time for her to leave was only days away.  

He kissed her head, letting his fingers glide through the curly hair that fell around her shoulders.  If they had children, they’d definitely have curly hair.  He could see it now, a bunch of red-headed Starsky’s all running around the house, Hutch screaming in frustration.  But, then that would never happen.  No, she’d have children, but not with him.

She moaned softly, snuggling deeper in his arms.  She’d awaken soon, awaken, and they’d head to Huggy’s for the switch.  They’d pretend that everything was okay, that they had weeks to love each other.  But it was getting harder—first weeks, now days.  And then nothing. 

He’d need Hutch when that happened.  He’d need Hutch more than he needed him after Gunther almost ended his life.  Gunther had done it with bullets, but this was different kind of ending.  So final, no last moment revivals.  He was already feeling dead inside.

“Dave, is it time to go?” she asked, opening a sleepy eye, making him fall more in love with her. 

He pulled his eyes away and spared a glance at the clock.  “Yes, we better get going.”

She sat up, stretching, as he massaged the knots from her shoulder.  He leaned forward, smelling her soft fragrance, pulling her hair up, and planting a kiss on her neck. 

“We’ll never get out of here if you keep doing that,” she said, even though she did nothing to stop him.

“Maybe, I don’t want to get outta here,” he said, pulling her back to the couch, kissing the back of her neck, turning her and placing soft kisses on her face. 

“Remember, the last time.  Hutch wasn’t too happy about us being late.”

“He’ll understand.”

“We could get caught,” she said teasingly, knowing full well it was impossible for anyone to find them here.

“Got a gun,” he said, the note of teasing echoed in his voice.  “Know how to use it,”

“And which gun is that?” she asked seductively, moving her hands up his chest.

He didn’t answer.  He was too busy showing her.

0000

 “You okay, Starsk?” Hutch asked, watching his friend who picked at his hamburger.  It was a rare sight to see Starsky without an appetite, but it was what he was seeing now and it scared him.

“I don’t know how to do this, Hutch.” 

Starsky voice was shaky and filled with emotion.  Hutch knew he had to get him out of the crowded restaurant, before the brunet completely broke down. 

He laid a tip on the table and stood, quickly ushering his shaken partner out the door to his waiting car. 

Starsky climbed in, not even mentioning the garbage strewn about the car.  It was uncharacteristic of the brunet, again showing Hutch just how bad off his partner was.  He seemed worn, and tired, ready to crash.  Hutch knew if he didn’t do something, he’d watch him crash and burn right here and now.

“Listen, Starsky.  I’m gonna help you,” he put a reassuring hand on his friends knee, pressing it gently. 

“You’ll see.  It’s gonna be okay.”

Starsky looked up into his friends sky blue eyes.  “I don’t know how to survive this one.  I’ve done this so many times, but I don’t know this time.  Don’t think I have the strength.”

“You’ll make it.  I’m gonna be there every step of the way.”  Hutch knew his partner needed him more than he ever had.  It had been tough losing Terry.  Starsky had stood by, stoic, strong for her, only breaking down after she died, and then, only with Hutch. 

It had been hard when Rosey left him, but there was something different about that relationship.  Something not so deeply rooted the way it had been with Terry and now with Evelyn.  This one would hurt his friend deeply.  Hutch felt so desperate to take the pain away, but he knew he couldn’t.  He could only be a shoulder to cry on, a person with whom he could show his true feelings.

“I love her so much it hurts, Hutch.  Hurts like a physical blow.  All the way down to my soul,” Starsky said, each word showing how perceptibly close to going over the edge he really was. 

Hutch put the car in drive and took off down the crowded streets of Bay City.  It was Valentine’s Day, a day for lover’s.  Starsky had asked Evelyn to the ball and she’d agreed.  It would be their last day together.  She would marry the next day.  He needed to get Starsky back and ready for the evening, but first he had to help him survive.

For the most part Hutch knew he was powerless to help his friend.  He could only try to make their last day together memorable.  It would have to last a lifetime.  But when the time came, would his partner actually be capable of letting her go?

“Don’t worry Hutch, I ain’t gonna go chargin’ into the wedding chapel to kidnap, Honey.” Starsky said in answer to his question.

Hutch was startled.  They could read each other’s minds, but it was still disconcerting when they did it.

“Can’t help but worry.  Never seen you like this.”

“I know.  Ain’t ever been like this.  Never will be again.”

Hutch didn’t like the sound of that.   He was more than grateful when the quiet street Starsky lived on came into view.  He pulled his car over.  

“I miss her Hutch, I really miss her,” Starsky said, his eyes straight ahead. “She ain’t even gone, and I feel like my heart’s been ripped out, dammit,” he said, striking his hand against the glass.  He pulled back, scrunching his face into a mask of pain.  Hutch grabbed his hand, accessing it for damage.  Finding none, he looked to his friend with concern.

 Starsky leaned back into the seat.  “I don’t…I don’t…God Hutch, it hurts,” he said, as the tears came quickly to his eyes.  Hutch pulled him into his arms, holding him desperately.  How many times could a man lose and go on?  How many times?

“I’m sorry, Babe.  So sorry,” he murmured into the curly hair as Starsky shook with sobs.  “I wish I could make this all better.  I can’t, but I’m here for you.”

“God, Hutch.  Don’t ever leave.  I couldn’t go on.  Couldn’t.”

Hutch was shocked at the desperation in the voice, the fear.

“Babe, I’m never gonna leave.  You never have to worry about that.”

They sat that way in the car, on a bright Feburary day, holding each other, each an anchor for the other.  It had always been their way.