A Fairy Tale

By M. Willow

What can I say?  I still don’t own the guys, but a girl can dream can’t she.  Just my little attempt at romance for the most romantic holiday of the year. 

This story contains adult themes. 

Thanks MWH for more than a few ideas.

Part one

Once upon a time there was a beautiful princess…

Starsky felt the warm press of her lips as she traveled down the length of his body.  He had never met a woman who could match him sexually, but this one could.  They had met at a bar.  Hutch had been out of town so he found himself alone and needing company.  The fiery redhead had entered the bar making every man take notice.  It was his lucky day.  She had sat next to him, making her intentions known by asking him what he was doing the rest of the night.  He had immediately countered with depends on what you’re doing the rest of the night.  That had been two weeks ago.  Since then they had made love everywhere they could think of.  She was adventurous, didn’t care who saw.  Most of the time he was the voice of reason, “No, honey, I don’t think it’s a good idea to make love on Captain Dobey’s desk.  I don’t care if he is having lunch somewhere else.  No, Honey, I don’t think the neighbors would like seeing that.  No Honey, we can’t make love on the elevator, after all it’s a see-thru elevator.  No, Honey, No Honey, No Honey, Oh yeah…Honey.”  And there were plenty of ‘Oh yeah’s’, like the exciting lunch in the supply closet of Parker Center where the menu included plenty to eat but no food.  It made the past two weeks the most exacting time of his life.

Honey.  It’s what he called her because she wouldn’t tell him her real name and her eyes were the color of honey.   She had ground rules—no names exchanged.  Just sex.  That’s all.  In two weeks she’d be gone and that would be the end of it.  Hutch was still out of town so he spent every moment with Honey.  Occasionally he wondered where she lived? Did she have a boyfriend?  Did she have kids?   That’s when she wasn’t doing what she was now doing to his body.  Honey had found an extremely sensitive part of his body to tease.  God he wished she could stay longer. But she’d made it clear that she was only here on vacation.   He knew every woman after her would pale in comparison. 

Hutch waited impatiently at the airport.  Where the hell was Starsky?  He had called two days ago letting Starsky know that he was arriving from Duluth at three o’clock the next day.  Well it was the next day and no Starsky in site.  Now that he thought of it, Starsky seemed preoccupied at the time.  He wondered if his friend was even aware of who he was talking to.  Hutch recalled a moan here and there, something about honey, a hasty okay and the phone was hung up. 

He was just starting to worry when he saw the swagger of his fast approaching best friend.

“Where the hell have you been?  I’ve been standing here waiting for at least an hour, Starsk.”

“Sorry Hutch.  I had to drop someone off and we kinda got carried away.”

Hutch noted the smirk on his friend’s face.  A smirk that said I just got laid and haven’t come off cloud nine yet.

Starsky grabbed one of Hutch’s suitcases; Hutch picked up the other one and both men headed for the car. 

LA was enjoying a bright January day with perfect weather.  Starsky opened the trunk and tossed the luggage inside.  Hutch followed suit, curiosity clearly evident on his face.   Both men got in the car and the stripped tomato headed for home. 

“Okay.  Who is she?” Hutch asked.

“Who?  I haven’t the foggiest idea.” Starsky said with a fake British accent. 

“The girl.  Who’s the girl?” Hutch asked, knowing that his best friend was waiting to brag. 

“Hutch, I’m in lust.  I just met the most sensuous, sexy, alluring, woman.  Man.  You shoulda seen her.  She had a body… oh, by the way how was Duluth?”

“Still there.  Now tell me about this new lady of yours.”

“It’s over.”

“Over.  Starsk, you just met her.  You sound like you like her.  What.  She called it off?”

“Sort of.  She was on vacation.  Only here for two weeks.  She went back home.  But man, when she was here.  Well let’s just say that there are some things she did that I’ll never forget.”

Hutch smiled.  He was happy to see Starsky in such great spirits after a long year of dismal cases and criminals who thought shooting cops was just a normal part of life.

“Anyhow.  That’s why I was late.  Had to drop her off at the bus station.  We got a little carried away saying goodbye, if you know what I mean.”

Starsky colored at that statement and Hutch knew what he meant. 

“You tellin’ me you spent two weeks in bed with a beautiful woman, Starsk?” Hutch teased, enjoying the easy banter and his partner’s momentary embarrassment.

“Yeah.  Sorry to see it end But, C’est la vie,”

Hutch was stunned by his friend’s use of a foreign language.  Starsky sort of stuck to the meat and potatoes of language. 

Starsky smiled broadly, aware of the shocked expression on the blond’s face.

“It’s what she say’s Hutch.  C’est la vie.”

“Was she French?” Hutch asked.

“Naw, She had some kinda accent, but I think it was a put on.  Made her mysterious, you know. Kinda exciting.”

Starsky pulled up in front of Venice Place and both got out.  Starsky opened the trunk and they each grabbed one piece of luggage.

“Mind if I crash on your couch, Hutch.  Too tired to drive home.”

“Starsky it’s not even four o’clock.”

Starsky started up the stairs, each step seemingly draining to the curly-haired detective.  “Yeah, but I haven’t got much rest since I met Honey.” 

Hutch reached above his door and grabbed the keys, entering the apartment and tossing the luggage to the floor. 

“Honey?”

“Yeah.  It’s the name I called her.  We each made up names for each other.”

“Do I want to know what she called you?” Hutch asked, mischief in his voice.

”Not on your life.  Not if you begged until your hair fell out.” Starsky said eyeing Hutch’s thinning hair.  “Not if the sky was fallin’ and tellin’ you would stop it from fallin’.

Hutch laughed heading for the kitchen as Starsky plopped down on the sofa.

“You sure you’re not sick?”  Hutch yelled back. 

“Naw, just tired.  Takes a lot outta a man to make love around the clock.  We pretty much spent the entire two weeks in bed among other places.”

Hutch headed for the kitchen, looked into the refrigerator and grabbed a beer.  “You gonna tell me about the ‘among other places part’?”

No answer. 

“Hey, Starsk, want a beer?”  

When Starsky didn’t answer, Hutch returned to the living room.  Starsky was out cold, his soft snores filling the room. 

 “I want you to guard the king’s daughter?” Dobey said to the two stunned detectives who sat in his office.  Hutch had only been home for a week and was looking forward to a normal case.  He wasn’t interested in being a bodyguard again.

“Did I just hear you say the king, captain?” Hutch asked, his face a mask of disbelief. 

Starsky removed his feet from Dobey’s desk and sat forward in his chair. 

“The what?” he asked.

“The king.  Can’t you two hear?  King Canton of Simbay.  It’s a small country, barely on the map.   You’re gonna guard his daughter.”

“Somebody tryin’ to kill her?”  Starsky asked, a serious expression on his face.

“No.” Dobey said.

“Somebody trying to kidnap her?” Hutch asked.

“No.” Dobey replied.

“Somebody threatening her?”  They both asked in unison.

“No. I’m afraid not,” Dobey answered, his eyes glancing down at a stack of papers on his desk.  Dobey cleared his throat and ran a hand through his hair.  Hutch could see the captain was uncomfortable.  Hell, he looked like he was actually blushing although his skin tone prevented Hutch from being sure.

Both detectives were leaning forward now anxiously waiting for the big man to speak. 

“You’re going to guard her virginity.” He said mumbled under his breath. 

Dobey grabbed the stack of papers and shuffled them, his eyes still refusing to meet the detectives.  Hutch felt sure he must have misunderstood.  Who in the twentieth century needed someone to guard their virginity?

“Captain, did you say guard her virginity?” he asked.

“Yeah,” Dobey shouted.  “That’s exactly what I said.  You and him are going to guard the princess’ virginity.”

Both detectives sat back in their chairs as Dobey continued.  “The king is in town to arrange for the marriage of his oldest daughter.  She’s marrying a baron in a few weeks.  Simbay is old fashioned.  They still believe a girl should remain pure until she marries. In Simbay that’s pretty easy since every man knows the king’s daughters and knows the penalty for….for….you know.  Here it’s a different story.  Her fiancé insists the marriage takes place LA.  Seem he likes Los Angles.  Bay City in particular.   Anyhow, the king has requested my most honorable men to guard his daughter’s ….his daughter’s well virginity.”  

“And you picked us?” Hutch asked, exchanging a disbelieving look with his partner.

“Of course not,” the big man shouted. “What do I look like, some kinda fool?  The king picked you after reading about you in a few newspapers.  Seems you two made an impression.”

“Why can’t he use his own people?” Hutch asked.

“His people don’t know the country.”  Dobey looked between the two detectives.  “Listen.  You got no choice in this so here’s your assignment.  You’re going to stay with the princess night and day.”  He handed Hutch a piece of paper.  “Here’s the address of the embassy.  Go home, get some clothes.  Enough for two weeks.  You’ll be staying at the embassy for the next two weeks.  Till the princess is married.”  Dobey sat back in his chair, rubbing his face with a handkerchief. 

“I’m gonna tell you something.  You better not mess up.  You don’t so much as look at her with lust.  You got it.  Not one look.”

Starsky locked eyes with Hutch.  “Captain.  I don’t think we’re the right choice.  Maybe a female detective or somethin’.  We’re not exactly the hands off types, you know.”

Dobey banged his hand loudly on his desk.  “Well you are now.  Both of you are guarding, guarding….Princess Evelyn like she’s your sister.  You make sure nobody gets near her.  I expect you two to behave like Knights of the Round Table.   Ya hear me.  Like damned knights.  If I so much as hear one thing that is not gentlemanly about you two, you’re both gonna be pounding the pavement.”

Starsky and Hutch both jumped when they heard that.   Hutch smiled sheepishly.  “You mean pounding the pavement as in wearing a uniform?” 

Dobey fixed him with a glare and Hutch had the decency to look away.

“So what does she look like, Captain?” Starsky asked eagerly, obviously unaware of the glare Hutch had received.  The dark haired detective had a smile plastered on his face as he awaited the reply. 

“She looks like you better not even think it.  That’s what she looks like.  Now both of you clowns get outta here.  Get to the embassy.  And remember, I better not hear anything but a good report from the king.  Now get outta here.  What are ya still sitting here for?”

Both men rose in unison and headed for the door.

Seven hours later the detectives stood in in the reception room of the embassy.  The embassy was housed in a large mansion owned by the king.  The opulence of the building harkened back to a bygone era with its Tiffany glass windows, marble fireplaces, and crystal chandeliers.  

Hutch had learned a few things about the king and his country.  It turned out Simbay was much like the countries of the past centuries, with its strict rules and hierarchies.  Women were little more than cows to the men of Simbay, suitable only for having babies and being beautiful.  As the oldest daughter, the princess was expected to marry well and to enhance the countries wealth by that marriage.  The youngest daughter was allowed to live her life as she saw fit.  Her children could never ascend to the thrown so it didn’t matter what she did as long as she was discreet.    Hutch found himself feeling sorry for the oldest daughter.  So much was expected of her, so much depended on her making the right marriage choices.  The princess was an identical twin so it had probably been only a few minutes that separated her from the freedom her sister enjoyed.  She would never get the chance to select the man of her dreams. She would never know what it was like to fall in love.  She had been betrothed to an old baron nearly fifty years older than she.  Hutch was adamant that he would allow the princess as much freedom as she could possibly have in the two weeks before her marriage.  Within reason of course. 

 “Kinda like time travel,” Starsky said excitedly.  Starsky fluttered around the room like a butterfly looking at everything from the paintings on the wall to the various porcelain pieces around the room.  Hutch had already identified original paintings by the masters and figured the room alone was home to millions of dollars worth of art work.

Starsky was right.  It did remind him of something out of another century.  But, it wasn’t the art work alone; it was the number of servants.  The place was filled with servants, from the butler, to the guards who wore bright red uniforms and stood at attention throughout the embassy.  His father use to reminisce about the number of servants he grew up with.  “A servant for every man, every need,” he’d said on one occasion.

“You could get lost in this place,” The dark-haired detective continued, looking around the room.  “Maybe this won’t be so bad after all.  You and me living in the lap of luxury.  Can you imagine that, Hutch?  You and me living in the lap of luxury.” 

“Yeah, I can imagine it,” Hutch said, a touch of sadness in his voice which immediately attracted Starsky’s attention.  Starsky had tried to get information about the trip to Duluth for the past week.  Each time, Hutch had dismissed his inquiry with a shrug, returning the conversation to the subject of Honey.  It had worked, but he knew Starsky was not about to let the subject drop.  Yet Hutch was tired of thinking about his dysfunctional family.  A family which would have made the ‘Adams Family’ a welcome replacement.  At least they loved each other.

“Sorry,” Starsky said, coming to sit next to him. “Forgot for a moment.  Living like this must seem pretty normal to you.” He put a hand on his shoulder, squeezing gently. 

“Starsk, we weren’t this rich.  We didn’t live in a castle.”

And the embassy did look like a castle, stark white against the sky, flying buttresses and all. 

“Looked like one to me when I saw it.  Hey, you want to talk about it?” he said quietly.

“Nothing you haven’t heard before.  I don’t know why I keep trying.  If your family doesn’t love you, there’s not much you can do about it.”

Starsky gave his partner a gentle squeeze.  The scene was threatening to get soapy.  Hutch knew it.   Starsky didn’t like soapy scenes.  Right now he wasn’t too fond of them himself.  They were about to meet royalty—a first for Hutch and certainly Starsky.  Hutch could literally feel Starsky’s excitement.  That is until his family came up.  He was determined to get the good mood back.  He’d be damned if his family ruined yet another part of his life. 

“Hey, how about we forget about Duluth and talk about our current case.  You know, I’ve never guarded a princess.” Hutch said.  Starsky gave him a reassuring look.  A look that said, I’m here for you when you’re ready to talk about it.  Finally he spoke, a broad smile crossing his face.

“And neither of us have ever guarded a girl’s virginity.” Starsky added, laughing.  “You know, maybe it might be better if the princess isn’t too attractive.”

Hutch gave his partner a startled expression.  “Somebody wake me.  My partner just said something I know I didn’t hear.”

“Hutch, think about it.  If she’s attractive gonna be harder to keep the guys away from her.”

Hutch leaned forward on the sofa, grasping Starsky’s hand.  He could see that Starsky was more caught up in the romance of meeting a real life princess then he was willing to admit.  Starsky was a romantic.  Valentine’s Day was fast approaching and he had a princess to guard.  It was far to perfect for the brunet to miss.  He was always a sucker for holidays.  At first, Hutch had thought it ended with Christmas.  But soon he found it was every holiday.  Even Ground Hog Day was a day to celebrate.  Hutch could still recall the Groundhog Day tee-shirt Starsky wore.  Dobey hadn’t been too pleased with it and said so.  “Don’t won’t any of my detectives being seen on the streets wearing a shirt with a large rat on it.” He’d shouted. 

Now Hutch eyed his partner knowing he had to set the curly-haired detective straight.

 “You mean, it might be tempting to you,” he said, a note of warning in his voice.  The princess was not for fantasies, no matter how close they were to Valentine’s Day.

 “Now listen.  You heard what Dobey said about pounding the pavement,” Hutch paused.  “I don’t want to know what he meant by pounding the pavement.  It’s hands off, Starsk.”

“Hey, can you imagine me taking her to that Valentine’s Day Ball at that fancy club?  Can you imagine it?  Me with a princess.”  Starsky said, caught in the moment, ignoring Hutch.

For the first time the precinct was hosting a Valentine’s Day Ball. The mayor thought it was a good idea considering the high divorce rate among detectives.  Most women simply didn’t like the life of a cop.  It was thought that a ball, which would include the wives and girlfriends of the cops, could somehow repair the damage inflicted on relationships by the nature of their jobs.  The mayor was spending a fortune on the gala black tie event, renting an old supper club that housed a large grand ballroom.

Hutch gave his partner a playful slap of his hair, causing Starsky to glare in confusion.

“Hey, whatcha do that for?”

“Cause you’re not listening.  Now, hands off.  No ball.  No nothing.  We’re here to guard the king’s daughter that’s all.”

“I know.  We’re Knights of the Round Table.  Honorable men.  But, you gotta admit it sure is fitting.  Valentine’s Day only weeks away.  A  princess.  A ball.   Wow, it’s right out of a fairy tell, Hutch.”

“A fairy tale that can end in jail, Starsk.  Remember.  We’re not in America now.  We’re on foreign soil.  You so much as look at her in lust, and you spend the rest of your life in a prison trying to learn the local language so you can speak to Bubba.”

“Aw Hutch.  That ain’t gonna happen.”

“No, cause you’re going to be on your best behavior.  Got it.”  Hutch said, looking at the wishful look on Starsky’s face.   “Got it?” he repeated.

“Okay, okay, okay.  Hand’s off.   Scout’s honor.” Starsky said almost whining.

But Hutch could see the look on Starsky’s face.  He was smiling, no doubt thinking about his fairy tale.  Hutch more than hoped that the princess would be some plain girl, someone not Starsky’s type.   The possibilities of a beautiful princess and Starsky easily making him nervous.

“Relax.  Sides, I’m all tuckered out from my time with the fantastic Honey.  Remind me to tell you about the time we went to….”

They were interrupted by the door opening and two, very stern looking palace guards entering, followed by a short man of about thirty.    The short man announced the king who glided into the room dressed in a grey suit.  The king was about sixty with close set eyes, and a thick head of curly, red hair, slightly tinged with grey.  Starsky bowed to the king.  Hutch extended his hand.  

The king acknowledged Starsky and shook Hutch’s hand with a firm grip.   “I’m detective Kenneth Hutchinson and this is my partner, detective David Starsky,” Hutch said.

“Ah, yes gentlemen.  Please be seated,” the king said.

The king sat in a large chair by the fireplace and Starsky and Hutch sat on the sofa facing the king.  Hutch noticed the rigid stance of the guards.  They seemed almost afraid of him.  So did the small man, for that matter.  The king was definitely a formidable man in spite of his friendly demeanor.  The guards left the room.  The short man moved to stand directly behind the king.

“This is my aide, Albert Fenton,” the king said indicating the short man.  “He will see to your comfort.  Any problems or arrangements you may require of course will be directed to him.  I will not have much time for you, I’m afraid.  I am a busy man you see.”

Fenton leaned down and whispered something to the king who looked at the two detectives. 

“Mr. Fenton has just informed me that my daughter is ready to see you.  She will join us shortly.  Meanwhile, I must tell you something of her.  She is a fragile girl, innocent to the ways of men.  I intend to keep her that way until she is married of course.  This marriage means a lot to my country.  Her intended, a Baron Sidrick, will bring much to Simbay.  In return, he will receive an heir, which has become quite important as he is nearing seventy.  My daughter is quite suitable for the task and will make his acquaintance on the day of her marriage.  Would you gentlemen like something to drink?”

Hutch almost didn’t’ answer.  The question of a drink seemed so out of place.  The man was talking about his daughter as if she were a business transaction.  He felt sorry for her.  She had been sentenced to a loveless marriage with a man old enough to be her grandfather.  Hutch knew what it was like to live without love.  She would not have an easy life.

“No, I’m fine.” He said declining the drink.  Starsky decline as well.  He also saw the concerned look his partner gave him, aware of his declining mood.  It was there way, reading each other even though not a word had been exchanged.

 The king snapped his fingers, and Fenton disappeared.

“You may be aware that I have two daughters.  They are twins.  Identical twins.  I find it hard to tell them apart I’m afraid.  Her twin sister will not be joining us until the eve of the wedding.  You see the girls are close.”  The king paused when Fenton returned handing the king a glass of wine served on a silver tray.  Fenton moved to stand behind the king.  It seemed aides were not allowed to sit.

“Her sister, Princess Lori, is against this union.  Truly, I think she prefers the baron for herself.  It is not her place of course.  It is the oldest daughter who must marry into position.  Lori may do as she pleases for the most part, but the girls are close and this marriage will end that.  Once Evelyn is married her relationship with her sister will never be the same.  Her duty will be with the baron.  At any rate, Lori is not happy with this arrangement.  It’s sad.  Of my two daughters Lori is most suited to marrying the baron.  She is very traditional and would certainly make the better wife.  Our customs expressively forbids such a union, however.”

“Why?” Hutch asked.  He had read a few things about Simbay customs, but not this part.

“She is the youngest.  It is the oldest who must be betrothed to a certain class.  She has been promised to the baron since she was born.”

Now Hutch felt sorry for both girls.  The king had said how close they were.  The only love they had probably felt came from each other.  The king clearly didn’t love his daughters.  They only had each other and now even that was being taken away.  He couldn’t imagine life without Starsky.  His parents hated the dark-haired detective, said it was unnatural, their relationship.  But Starsky gave him something his parents never could—love.  He thought of the girls and was saddened.  He wondered who was more in jeopardy of losing his heart: he or Starsky?

The king sat back with a satisfied grin.  “Now for your duties.  The princess enjoys shopping.  She will be in need of a sizable wardrobe for her impending nuptials as well as for her own amusements.  Within reason of course.   You will see to her saftey during these trips.  I have dismissed the chauffer.  One of you will drive, the other will sit in back with my daughter.”  The king somberly glanced between the two men. 

“I have done considerable research on you.  I am aware of your….how shall I say… closeness.  It is why you have been given this assignment.  I know that you will have no interest in my daughter.”

Starsky startled, opening his mouth to protest.  Hutch caught his eyes sending a silent message to stay quiet.  The king obviously thought they were gay.  It wouldn’t be the first time people got the wrong idea about their relationship.  They were close.  Two halves of the same soul.  Yet, both men were strongly heterosexual.  Still, Hutch wanted the case.  He watched as Starsky closed his mouth and was grateful for their ability to communicate without words.  He had no doubt the king would have dismissed them on the spot had he known of their very heterosexual tendencies.

The king continued to speak.   “I have arranged a suite for you.  It has two bedrooms.  While you’re here, I’d appreciate it if you each stayed in your own room.  Of course, I have no way of enforcing this rule, however I would prefer….”

Starsky chimed in before the king could continue, “No problem.  It’s only for a couple of weeks after all.”

The king noticeably relaxed.   “Good, then it’s settled.”

 The door opened and the guards entered with a young woman.  She was unremarkable, with clear light brown eyes and a small upturned nose.  Her hair was pulled into a tight bun that made her resemble a woman much older, but brought out the high cheekbones of her face.  The dress she wore was long, green, and shapeless, giving no hint of her figure.  Every inch of her body was covered by the dress.   She wore no makeup.  Hutch felt as if he were seeing beauty trapped beneath the heavy weight of the dress.  Here was a woman who probably put as much time into looking plain as some women put into looking beautiful.  Still, he could see her subtle beauty.

The guards quickly left the room and the king spoke in the rich accent of Simbay. 

“This is my daughter Evelyn.  You may call her this as is the custom of my people.  Evelyn these are detectives David Starsky and Kenneth Hutchinson.”

Hutch spared a glance at his partner who was looking at the girl in rapt attention.  The girl blushed and shyly averted her eyes instead focusing her attention on Hutch. 

“I’m very pleased to meet you, detectives Hutchinson and Starsky” The girl said in a thick accent. 

“Please call me Ken,” Hutch said.

 Hutch waited for Starsky to speak but the brunet seemed lost in thought.  Hutch wondered what had made his normally talkative partner into the tongue-tied man standing in the room with him now. 

“You can call him Dave,” Hutch said loudly, hoping to catch his friend’s attention.  It seemed to do the trick.  His partner gave him a sheepish look and returned his attention to the king. 

“As you can see the princess is very delicate.”  The king said as if this fact was an obvious trait of the girl.   “I have arranged quarters for you near her room.  Tomorrow she will shop. You will of course accompany her on all such excursions.  Other than that, do with your time as you see fit.”  The king paused, taking a sip of his wine, “Within reason of course.”  The king said this in a way that could be understood by the two detectives yet not disturb the delicate sensibilities of his daughter.

Hutch spared a puzzled glance at Starsky.  The curly-haired detective was still looking at Evelyn as if he were trying to determine something about her.  He seemed almost in shock and oblivious to his presence or the king’s for that matter.  Hutch was pretty good at reading his partner.  Starsky was disturbed about something and that something was Evelyn. 

Hutch cleared his throat when he realized that neither he nor Starsky had responded to the king’s last statement.  He was about to respond when Starsky spoke, his voice low, “Yes, we’ll be happy to take Evelyn shopping.”  He never took his eyes from the princess.

The king stood.  “Well, then.  Our business has been concluded.  I’m sure you gentlemen would like to refresh yourselves.  Fenton will show you to your room.” 

As if on cue, the two guards returned and Hutch found himself wondering how they knew when to return.  He hadn’t seen the king or Fenton do anything to summon them.  Hutch stood first and discretely gave his partner a shove.  Starsky stood and they followed Fenton out of the room.

0000000000000

“It was Honey, Hutch.  I’d know her anywhere.”

The two were in the living room of their suite and Starsky was pacing the floor, his hands rubbing nervously through his hair. Hutch was hovering by the window his eyes following the brunet.

“Wait a minute.  You’re saying that nice girl.  That girl that looked like she walked out of a “Little Women’ novel, that pure, gentle, girl.  The one we’re here to guard her virginity is the same woman you spent two weeks in bed with?”  Hutch voice was incredulous.

“That’s what I’m saying.  Yeah, Honey wore tons of makeup.  Yeah, Honey wore skin-tight dresses with necklines cut to there, but that’s who I just saw.”

Hutch walked purposely toward Starsky, raising the famous Hutchinson finger at the same time. “Not possible.  No way.  You’re mistaken.”   First, you’re not going to say a thing because you’re wrong.  Second, you’re going to stay away from her, third you’re going to forget this Honey person.  She’s gone.”

Starsky looked at him, a look of pleading in his eyes.  “How my suppose to stay away from her?  Answer me that Hutch.  Remember.  We’re here to guard her.  Take her around.  Unless you can figure out how to find someone to impersonate me, I’m gonna be alone with her at some point.”

Hutch furrowed his brow.  Starsky was right.  He didn’t want to drop the case and there was no way he was doing this without his partner.  “Ever thought you might have been with the twin sister?  Even the king said he couldn’t tell them apart.”

“No.  Felt like Honey.”

Hutch sighed exasperated with his dark-haired partner.  “What did you mean ‘felt like Honey’?  You never even shook her hand?”

“I can tell.  I was with her for two weeks.”

Hutch was furrowed his brow.  How to get through to his pig headed partner making him frustrated.  He had spent the past few hours listening to his partner brag about Honey.  No way was the sexual adventuress, Honey, the same woman as the shy Evelyn.  No way.

“Starsky, I’m warning you.  Dobey said we’ll be pounding the pavement if either of us even thinks about her.  Now, I for one, don’t want to find out what he meant by pounding the pavement.  I for one don’t want to see our faces plastered all over the newspaper for inciting an international incident.  I for one don’t want to find out if Huggy’s got cousins in Simbay to get your sorry ass out of prison.”  He was yelling now, trying to get his partner to see reason.

“Okay, okay, okay.  You don’t have to shout. I won’t say anything.  Maybe you’re right.”

Hutch gave a sigh of relief.  “Course I’m right.  Princess Evelyn probably has never even been kissed.  She’s an innocent. Anybody can see that.”

Starsky gave a lustful smile, his mind clearly traveling back to the fun times with Honey. 

Hutch knocked his partner on his head and the brunet gave a yelp.  “What ya do that for, Hutch?”

“Get your mind out of the gutter and into the shower.  Make it a cold shower.”

“Okay, okay, okay.  Starsky said, making a hasty retreat for his room.  Hutch plopped down on the sofa, propping his arms behind his head.

 “Oh, you know what the king did?”  Starsky said while standing at the door. 

“What?” Hutch asked, looking up at his partner. 

“Hired himself a couple of eunuchs to guard his daughter.” 

Hutch reached for a pillow and aimed it at his quickly retreating partner.